Giving Thanks

November 25, 2011
"Giving Thanks"
In nature God gave us so many pictures of His loving care.  When I look at this mother bird with the little chicks under her wings I see myself and my best friend, Gerald.  How thankful I am today for the way God cuddles us close to Him.  Finally  I can say I'm thankful for these desert years - thankful for the lessons I've  learned and especially  the simplicity of my relationship with God.  It feels so good to know I can cuddle under His wings and recount the ways that I love Him, even when I don't feel anything at the moment but empty.  I'm thankful I don't have to pretend to be super spiritual when I feel as flat as one can be and still breathe.  I'm thankful for a Mother who held me under her wings without clipping mine.  I'm thankful for a husband who hasn't a clue how to hold me or anyone else under his wings, but loves me with every ounce of his being.  I'm thankful I learned a long time ago how to "Mother" myself.  Through the years I've experience the  heights and deeps of life, I've had wonderful friends and I've had acquaintances  who betrayed - I'm thankful for both ends of the spectrum - let's me know I'm fully human and so are they.  I've wanted to run away and I've wanted to stay forever, somewhere in the middle I found that how I feel at any given moment may not be the sum total of my existence, just a feeling and it too will pass.   Tonight I'm thankful for my precious boys and their families - I'm glad they have a place to belong and someone to love them for themselves.  In looking at all these things that I'm thankful for I have to confess; it's hard for me to be thankful in the waiting room.  I want to make things happen, I want to work, I want to make a difference, I want order and purpose to come again. .. I'm thankful that I can still say these things and still know that tonight I'll sleep under the Father wings, just like every night since I came HOME to Him.  Tonight I am thankful!
paulette

Iron Skillet Pecan Pie

Iron Skillet Pecan Pie

1/2 of a ref. pkg. piecrust

1 Tbs. Powered Sugar

4 Lrg. Eggs

1  1/2 cups firmly packed Brown Sugar

1/2 cup butter melted & cooled to rm. temp.

1/2 cup granulated Sugar

1/2 chopped pecanws

2 Tbs. flour

2 Tbs. 1/2 & 1/2

1  1/2 tsp. pure Vanilla

1  1/2 cups pecan halves

Preheat oven to 325, press piecrust into 10" skillet, sprinkle with powdered sugar

Whip eggs til foamy, whip in brown sugar

Then add next 6 ingred.

Pour into piecrust and top with 1 1/2 cups pecan halves

Bake 30 minutes at 325 ~ then lower to 300 and bake 30 min.  Turn off oven and leave in the oven for 3 hours

Yea!  this could be the start of a new thing in pies ~ 

ENJOY

paulette

Home at Last

   
There have been times in these ten years that I've wondered, where is home?  I've looked for it in the places we've lived, the people we've ministered to and daily routine that has been the glue to hold us together.  Gerald and I have been married almost 53 years,  we're still best friends and lovers, but he has such a vagabond heart, I could never say he was home, although he has been the most constant human on the planet.   He has called a few churches home, but I wouldn't say a church house would be my home.  Recently I reconnected with friends from the 70's and declared surely this is home ~ they were not home.  Then five weeks ago we moved again (are you suprised?) and I asked that question again - where is home, is it in the same town with our wonderful children?    I know the answer at last. . . my home is in God.  That is the only place I feel complete, the only place I feel truly secure, the only place I feel totally understood and yes,  loved un-conditionally.  Does not that home include the important people and places that I've talked about;  only it I know for myself who God truly is ~ God is home.  It's surely sweet to rest in His presence, consume His words and practice His principles.

I think all these years with all the moves and all the people the one thing that needed to be addressed:  do I trust God with all the unknown, with all the inconsistencies, with all the changes?   His Name means Trust - The God in whom I Trust!  I know we have that on our coins momentarily, "In God we Trust" ~ but for me it has finally become the bed I sleep in, the clothes I wear, the food I eat, the people I love and the work that calls my name.  Home, Trust, Security, Love - He wraps it all up when he said, "Come unto me and I will give you rest".  Rest from my wandering, rest from the people that I cannot complete, and most important of all rest from myself.  Yep, it takes a life time of living to come full circle and know - my Home is in God.  Wow, home at last;  think I'll take my shoes off and sit awhile - it feels so good to be Home!
Paulette

Living Free

Living Free

There have been times in my life when I felt that I was a free agent and times, I must admit,  I  limited myself  by my surroundings, my upbringing and my associations.

I am a Southerner, born and bred.  I like all things Southern; the food, the soft language, the landscape  the architecture and most of the people. 

 In 1972 my husband and I moved out of the South and I was plunged into a totally different culture.  Living in the Southwest was an experience in change.  I learned to love Mexican food, I learned to say, "You bet!", I came to love this dry arid land with its miles of flat, unadored vistas,  can't say I ever learned to love flat top houses, but I do appreciate the adobe style, and of course  the people  from the four winds of the world ~ I fell in love with their acceptance, their loving kindness, their straight forward way of thinking and expressing themselves.  I remember making the comment, "the stork got confused and dropped me off in Americus, Georgia instead of where I was destined to go;  New Mexico.  

 Coming to New Mexico all those years ago was so different from the return we made in December of 2010.  The difference ~ I had changed.  I am no longer an innocent young woman, instead I am a seasoned traveler and a bit jaded I must confess.  I longed to be in New Mexico all the years that we were away, now that I'm here again I see it with eyes wide open and a heart that has been shattered many times in the journey of the years.  I'm no longer fascinated by the food, the western drawl, the wind that howls constantly with gusts up to 70mph.  The town is still ugly and limited, the people that I've loved through the years have too, been beaten up by life and relationships that failed them.  They've been rejected, lied on, abandoned and used.  We remember who we were, we need lots of time to discover who we are in the now.  Can there be freedom in the acceptance of who we are now, I surely do hope so!  Living free takes all the resources of our imagination and determination!  It's not an accidential meeting of the minds. . . it takes deep introspection,  an honest appraisal and   it's being real in a surreal world. 

So, here I am this morning looking at myself,   asking; will you turn loose of all expectations and just let life be what it is,  or will I destroy the precious moment by turning it into a landscape that is bleak and withering?  I've always said, "Change is certain, choice is a decision".   I know I'm going to choose the right thing, that's who I am in my head, but will my heart still turn around like Lot's wife and look back at the  destruction and say, "but I could have made a difference"........ No,  we don't change the landscape by wishing we could and we don't change people by wishing they would.  I must pick up my trust and embrace the truth in order to be free.  I know I can't make the ugly go away, I can't wish and make the good happen, BUT I can choose each breathing moment to live in the Freedom that Christ bought for me on Calvary and that freedom is to be myself in this moment, trusting God with the outcome, leaning on the Word and not on people, studying to show myself approved and looking to the source of my supply and not to circumstances.  

   Am I willing to be just Paulette, a Southern born child in an Senior adult world with people as frail as myself and say to "my world", "So, I'm  here and that's what counts.  Am I free?  You bet I am!  And I'm gonna keep on going til I crest the ridge - I promise to go out still changing into the person God dreamed I could be.  "He whom the Son sets free, is free indeed!"